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12 Things I Wish My Fairy Godmother Told Me Before My Divorce

  1. You will feel  like you were blindsided by a huge 18 Wheeler Mac Truck, and you are the bug splat on the windshield. This part sucks. There is nothing I can say to make it better. You just have to go through it.
  2. You will do things completely out of your character that you thought only women who are insane or who have no integrity or impulse control do. Don’t beat yourself up over this. You didn’t do anything that bad really, and you didn’t break any laws. You just squish up his $1500.oo designer suits all into one moving box and give them to charity. Um… you might phone his girlfriend and call her “a family wrecking disgusting whore”. Yeah, that is not one of your best moments, but it really is a great story your girlfriends love to hear.
  3. You will self-medicate with alcohol, and then finally go to the doctor for a short-term prescription of Xanax and a therapist for emotional support. Be proud of yourself you didn’t turn into an alcoholic, and even prouder you got yourself the serious help you needed to get through this traumatic time in your life. Never be ashamed of taking a prescribed medication you need to get yourself better.
  4. You will cry more than you ever have in your life. Yeah well, you’re a crier. Don’t be so hard on yourself for that. Get some great eye cream.  A little botox might help the anguish lines on your forehead. You will lose 20 pounds you didn’t need to lose, and then you will be in the best shape of your life gaining it back, exercising, and learning how to eat right. The good news is you never get that middle-aged waste line because there was no fat there to begin with as you hit 40. So remember to always look at the positive in the negative situation.
  5. You will learn how strong and intelligent you really are, and that you are a FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH!
  6. You will fight for what you need and you won’t stop fighting until you get what your children need. You will learn there are much better ways than fighting to get your needs and goals met. You will learn that what your children need is not always what you need and in knowing that, regardless of how hard it is for you, you will do what is right for your children because that is the type of mother and person you are.
  7. You will not lose your best friend. After the war and the collateral damage is tallied, he will end up still being your friend. You will be surprised that no matter how mean you are to him he will always stand by you. And girl! You will be really mean! Sometimes when people go through emotionally traumatic things they behave in ways that are not their true nature. Remember that is not who you are. Don’t let your behavior or what he did define you. He will do the right thing financially for you and the boys, and he will still be a great dad.
  8. You will learn how gracious and forgiving you can be. You are able to get past your pain, anger and grief and you will let your ex-husband be a part of your children’s lives and your life in a different way. You rise above all of the nonsense to do this.
  9. You will learn how to do all sorts of things you didn’t think you could. You will learn how to manage your portfolio and that you rock at it! You will open your private practice. You will buy your own house. You will learn how to be mom and dad in different situations.  The baseball world becomes tricky as it’s hard to be a mom in a dad’s world. But you manage just fine. You are a really good mom and dad. You will buy your first car all by yourself.  You will start your own business and become a CEO. You will design, author, and write articles for your own website and guest write articles for others. You have so many gifts you have yet to discover. The list goes on and on. You become the independent woman you always wanted to be.
  10. You will travel the world. Yes! You will go to Paris finally! You will take yourself to New York. You will take your sons to see different countries and learn about the world outside of the United States. You will take them all over the United States including Boston and Hawaii. The three of you. Guess what?  Traveling alone with your boys will be the most amazing experience of your life over the next 8 years!!!
  11. You are fine on your own. You will thrive and flourish in your own life. A life you get to design. You reinvent yourself into a better more amazing version of yourself.
  12. You get the most amazing dog.  You always wanted a dog. Who knew how much love and he would bring you. You even let him sleep on your bed!
  13. You find your happiness. It’s inside of you.

 

I wish I could prevent this all from happening to you. When it does, I wish I could shield you from all of the pain and angst you will go through. You know what? If I had, you never would have been forced to become the fabulously amazing person you are today.

 

Sending Magic Fairy Dust Your Way,

XOXO Fairy Godmother

 

 

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